I get it!!

Or at least I think I do.

I've been out of town the past weekend. We flew to Miami with my husband's brother and wife and their two kids. It was a short trip but a lot of fun.

We flew into Miami at night and I had a window seat. There to my left was a huge crescent moon, I felt like I could reach out and touch it.

Something about this moon touched me and I began to worship the Lord thanking Him for such beauty. What an awesome God He is!

And then I saw it. The Miami coastline. It was AMAZING. Just beautiful. SO many lights. Thousands and thousands of little dots for miles.

And then I thought of all the souls down there. And then I understood. Imagine this: imagine all of those souls turning away from their self and turning toward God and with one voice worshiping Him. Adoring Him.

Wow!

It's what He wants!

As I looked down I wondered how many souls were worshiping Him at that moment, and I joined my voice with theirs. What an awesome God He is. Really there are no words to describe Him.

I'll never forget that moment, flying over so many people and looking down and feeling like I was getting a view that God gets. I can't wait for the harvest. For the time when the weeds are swept up and burned and all that's left behind is the wheat. And every soul on earth is made pure and righteous through Christ and we all worship Him the way we were made to!

So do they think I'm crazy?

Last week I joined a fitness club to get in shape and I've enjoyed every minute of it. They have great childcare so my children have a wonderful time playing with other kids and I get to work out and focus on me. Working out is great for stress and very important. I've always worked out, I was a swimmer in high school and before having kids I competed in mountain biking. But with two little ones there has been much time for me.

Thankfully the Lord has blessed me and made a way for me to join this club and get the exercise I need. Last night I took a boot class camp and I giggled the whole time as I tried to figure out how to coordinate my body to the music. It was so much fun!

Another great thing about this club is they have a cafe so after I work out I can grab a bite and eat in peace while my two little ones are right down the hall.

I discovered a wonderful little thing about my ipod. I've had that thing for a couple of years and never use it much. So when I started to work out I pulled it out and I quickly discovered I can download radio broadcasts from Joel Osteen and Joyce Meyer. I also bought an audio book from Beth Moore called A Heart Like His and I can listen to all that while I'm sweating at the gym! Yea! My faith can grow right along with my muscles!!! ha!

I also discovered something called God's ipod and I download worship music. So during my down time at the cafe I listen to worship music and pray.

I wonder if they think I'm crazy.

There I am.

The new girl.

The one in the corner.

And I'm praying!

It only takes a second and I go from sitting in a cafe to worshiping at my Fathers throne!

I wonder if they would mind if I turn the unused racket ball court into a prayer room? I can envision myself walking around that court speaking in my heavenly language!

Today I'm taking a kick boxing class and after that I'm off to the cafe and this time with my HUGE HEAVY Bible for some good reading!

Ha! They are really going to think I'm crazy.

If only I could tell them .....'Man does not live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.'Matthew 4:4

If only they knew that spiritually they are starved to death without Him.

What is sweeter than honey?

Tuesday mornings I share leadership with two other woman at my church for a Woman's Bible study class. Today wasn't my turn to lead and the lady leading put the usual study lesson aside and decided to have us just read our favorite passages from the Word.

We each took turns reading out our favorite passages and what they mean to us. I felt the Holy Spirit enter that room and I felt His power falling down! It was awesome! I got a warm tingle all over me and a joy came over me that was thrilling.

There is nothing more exciting to me that to get together with other believers and read the Word. His Word is so sweet to me, sweeter than honey. His Word is so thrilling to me, I could soak it up for hours.

After we finished reading we had our usual prayer time and this was my prayer: Oh God, thank you, thank you, thank you!!!! I can't thank you enough for creating me. For making me so that on this Tuesday I can sit with this group of woman and DELIGHT in reading Your Word. You are awesome. You are amazing! I love you!!

Who is Jesus?

I'm getting to know Jesus and He's thrilling! The whole plan of God is just genius. I haven't found religion or a set of rules, I'm experiencing a personal relationship. God through His son Jesus has invited me to experience Him. And its mind blowing!

I found this versus in Matthew last night that perfectly describes my Savior. These are His words:

Matthew 11:28-30 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

My Savior is gentle and sweet. He begs me to give Him my problems. He wants to take all my burdens and pain for Himself and in exchange He gives me rest. He slows down my beating heart. He takes my anxiety and gives me peace. He knows just what I need and He wants me. He wants me as I am. I don't have to clean up before I can meet with Him. He loves me flaws and all. The more flawed I am, the more gentle and loving He becomes. He is a healer and He loves to heal!

Oh He is awesome!

The Holy Spirit whispers

In the very early morning hours as I was in bed slowly waking up the Holy Spirit whispered the 23rd Psalm to me. That was the sweetest way to wake up I could ever think of. AWESOME!

The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death, [a]
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

Unusual dream

Last night after I felt God speak into my heart and tell me "I am here. I will not leave" you'd think I'd have slept peacefully but not so.

I had a very unusual dream I believe is from the Lord.

In this dream I was in my condo and everything was very dark and black and I was under a spiritual attack. But instead of being invisible I could see the spiritual world and I could see this attack happening to me. Over and over an evil spirit came up to me and tried to overtake me. A fog and blackness would surround me and I couldn't think straight, I could see. I didn't know where I was going. I couldn't understand how or why this was happening to me. I kept thinking to myself "but I'm a Christian, how can this evil spirit be trying to overtake me?" Yet over and over the spirit came and this fog of blackness would surround me. It would confuse me.

I tried so hard to fight this spirit off but it seemed he was winning and it terrified me. All the sudden I knew what to do, I started praying and surrounding myself with my family. It dawned on me I needed them very much to fight this evil thing off. Suddenly I saw my Uncle Rick and Aunt Tricia (pastors at Leesburg First Assembly of God) and they were lit by a very white light. They were praying and then I saw the rest of my family and the more they prayed and surrounded me the more I could see the way out. With their prayers I was able to fight off this evil spirit! It was amazing.

Now I take this dream to mean I'm under a spiritual attack (I've felt it for weeks) and I know I've got lots of family praying for me. The Lord has been dealing with me about prayer and how I need to be in prayer more. I've felt Him show me if I want to win this spiritual battle I've got to pray.

This dream just confirms that. Isn't God awesome?

Just in time

This past week I've been feeling so discouraged and so distant from God.

I've felt so ALONE. There are times when I feel like my husband and I are night and day and how on earth is this going to work? Suddenly so much has changed. Our values and goals in life are very different now. His values are still based on the world. My values and goals are TOTALLY oppossite of that. I don't see things the same way. What once used to be SO important is meaningless now.

At times all this makes me feel very alone, so last night as I was turning the lights off for bed I felt unsure about my faith and heard the question "what am I doing?" bouncing around in my mind. I just felt LONELY.

Well as I was standing at the sink brushing my teeth all the sudden God spoke to me and said "I am here. I will not leave." Instantly a peace came over me and at once I felt Him and His amazing love.

Isn't God wonderful? Right when I needed Him, when I needed to feel Him, to experience Him, He showed up!

I got in bed and just laid there with a smile on my face knowing that I am NOT alone.

The book The Unusual Suspect

My wonderful mother ordered me the book The Unusual Suspect by Stephen Baldwin and it just arrived today. I can't put it down it's so good.

Thankfully my 10 month old naps long and my 2 year loves The Little Mermaid so I've gotten through a good portion of the book.

For those who don't know Stephen Baldwin is a Hollywood actor who has become born again and wrote a book with a subtitle My Calling To The New Hardcore Movement of Faith.

So far the thing that's stood out the most to me in this book is the story of Stephen's wife. She got saved first and when he saw the change in her he got interested. He said she prayed for one solid hour every morning face down on the floor beside the bed and then read her Bible for 30-45 minutes in bed and then got up for the day. She did this again at night.

He said he had to step over her every morning when he got out of bed. After 10 months of her doing this he realized she must be experiencing something and he was missing out. The story continues but wow:

This women spent two hours a day face down on the floor in prayer.

........I think I need to start doing some more praying.

What ELSE does light do?

My mom commented on my last post and said:

I just love that scripture: "Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path." Psalm 119:105.

It's one of the first (of hundreds) I learned as a child. Course we used the King James Version then. "Thy Word is a lamp..."

It's such a great visual. When our little grandsons visit, they love to go in our large, walk-in closet with flashlights. The little one, Nicholas, doesn't want the door closed. He's afraid, and wants more light than just the flashlights. It's amazing how comforting a light is in the darkness. And it guides us. They like to roll under Milton's long row of shirts and get to the back wall of the closet. Occasionally, they'll find a hanger on the floor and bring it out.

Hmmm. What are some other things a light in darkness does?

I'm getting great visual pictures right now!

In fact, they're so good, I need to turn off my computer and go have my devotions and Bible reading!

:)
Love, Mom

I'll tell you what else light does: Light DISPELS darkness. Think about that one for a moment! Let that roll around your brain and see what that one will do for you!

I read on someone's blog, sorry I can't remember who, but this person heard Ted Dekker speak and someone asked him if he was ever afraid. And he said "no." Then he was asked "well why not?" His response "Light dispels darkness."

When I read that it changed the way I think about things.

Think about LIGHT and DARKNESS. Darkness can NEVER overcome light. Light pierces and pushes away and DISPELS darkness.

A lot of things I've feared all my life suddenly vanished when I realized I carry this light from Christ inside of me and where ever I go this light dispels darkness.

light for my path

Psalm 119:105 Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

If the Word is a lamp for my feet and a light for my path in this DARK world, then how without the Word will I be able to see and know which way to go?

Without the Word I'm walking blind and aimless not knowing where I'm going or where I'm headed. Scary thought huh?

Now, how can the Word be a lamp and a light unless I know it, read it and hide it in my heart?

Without the Word I notice I start dying spiritually. I like to describe it as a slow rot that comes on and man do I start to stink fast! I can even smell it myself and I hate that feeling, it disgusts me.

Yet you know what? To my curiosity I've noticed how quickly I can get used to that nasty and painful rot. That's an even scarier thought.

So you might ask, what then is the cure for this rot? Thankfully the cure is so simple!! All I have to do is dive back into the Word.

The Word is like a soothing balm to my soul. I feel myself coming alive again. A peace and a warmth wash over me and I start jumping from place to place in the Word delighting over what I find. It's awesome!

The psalmist wrote it best when he said: How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey to mouth!

So you might ask why then do I let this rot even creep up??? And here I pause and tell myself I can't be the only Christian who does this.

Anyway, why does this rot come on? Because life gets busy. Because babies get sick and need lots of care. Because houses need cleaning. Because dinner needs to be cooked. Because mommy is exhausted at the end of the day and dead tired in the mornings.

My heartfelt prayer; Lord you see into my heart, even the deepest parts and so you know-I LOVE YOU. You are my strength, my joy and my delight. You are awesome, you are genius, you are amazing. Here I am Lord once again. I'm a tired mommy but I'm yours to use as you can. I open myself to you, it's all I can do!