Thursday, December 20, 2007

The Healing Room

Yesterday I went with my mother to a place called The Healing Room. It's a unique place where one can go and receive ministry regarding healing. They pray with you and have a room of worship.

I was very intrigued by the name and I was surprised by what I experienced. We went to a house that had several rooms set up for prayer. One room had dark wine colored drapes over the windows and a large cross in the corner with a wine colored cloth draped across. Soft worship music played in the background and a picture of a radiant Jesus welcoming a bride into the wedding feast hung on the wall. Small rocking chairs that sat directly on the floor (no legs) created a relaxing atmosphere. A candle burned under another picture of Jesus. Right away I could feel a sense of awe mixed with peace and a sweetness in the place.

In another room we watched a 20 minute dvd on healing, won't go into details there but once again I was surprised by what I heard. Then, four prayer warriors led my mother and father off to another room for a time of prayer and ministry.

The rest of us there went into the worship room with the cross. First off, I picked one of those rocking chairs, hey might as well be comfy when you pray, right? I must not have sat right because the thing was kind of C shaped and I fell back and almost landed with my feet over my head. Good thing I had pants on! Thankfully everyone seemed deep in prayer.

Right away I tried praying but couldn't! Isn't that odd? I thought, now here I am in a special prayer room and all I feel is silence in my soul! I tried over and over, praying different ways, praying different things. But all I was getting was silence. So then I decided, well if I'm not storming the gates of heaven like I thought I would be, I might as well just sit back in this rocking chair and relax, maybe take a nap! JK! So I stretched back, kicked my legs out in front of me and relaxed my whole body and just got real comfy! As I sat there listening to everyone pray around me, something started happening. It was like my soul became a sponge. I didn't have to pray or say or do anything. I opened my palms face up and it was as if those prayers became my own. A peace that I can't describe came all over me. Time stopped. Anxiety stopped. My thoughts stopped and my soul saw a slice of heaven and I saw God. I saw the God of I AM! He just was. Everyone was worshipping Him and I felt the presence of Jesus. I involuntarily smiled, I couldn't help it! He was so sweet. My heart started racing, the thought crossing my mind that if I were older I'd probably have a heart attack because my physical body couldn't handle His glory. Soon it felt like my heart would beat out of my chest and then I starting getting afraid. As quick as my heart started beating like crazy, it stopped and I felt it's familiar comforting rhythm. I felt myself slipping back into this old world and I remember saying to God, "Oh God, I'm young, my heart is young, I can handle some more!" "Give me more!"

It was quite an amazing experience and I learned some very healing things myself! I'll have to share them in another post for another day.

I guess what surprised me most was learning that God just is! All He has for me is already there. All He has done for me has already been done. I just have to receive it! Yesterday was about learning how to receive.

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

The name Jesus

Even the name Jesus brings such peace. Sometimes when I don't know what or how to pray I just pray His name. There is something about saying His name that causes a change in me and yesterday I saw the same thing at work with my children.

We were driving in the car and Lorenzo, my 2 year, was screaming. He's been having a hard time adjusting to all that's going on. He's also going through the terrible two's. He's been having screaming fits where nothing helps, and I've tried it all so it seems. It suddenly came to me to just pray for him. So I told Claudia my 3 year old, "Claudia, let's pray for Lorenzo."

So I prayed "Dear Jesus, help Lorenzo!" As soon as I said the name Jesus he instantly calmed down. I continued to pray asking Jesus to help Him. To my surprise Claudia started praying too! And not just coping what I was saying, she had her own unique prayer. Her prayer was "Jesus touch Lorenzo's heart." And "God help Lorenzo with your son."

Instantly I felt the peace of Jesus and I KNOW those children did too. There really is "just something about the name of Jesus." Hey isn't that an old song?

Thursday, December 13, 2007

God and GBM

GBM stands for Glioblastoma Mulitiforme. Grade four brain cancer. Terminal. No cure and no way out. Has anyone survived? When asked the doctor replied, "What do you mean by survival?" One doctor looked in my eyes and said "When GBM is small, contained and completely removed the patient could live many more years.

My mother's GBM is large, not contained and spread throughout. When my Dad and I sat the doctors office and heard once again how brutal GBM is, we caught each other eyes and unspoken the look was "Oh God!"

The more I've thought about GBM and studied it, the more it has seemed that in the natural GBM is bigger than God. If it were any other cancer, any other type I could see...but GBM?

I've struggled in my heart about what God is up too, what His will is in all this but I've decided I'm not going to worry about that anymore. He can have His plan, His will and I'm going to have His HOPE.

The fact is God IS bigger than GBM!!! And GBM IS UNDER SUBMISSION TO OUR GOD!!! That tumor has to submit to God! I call it out by name and with the healing power of the name of Jesus command it to submit and in the same breath I cry out to my merciful God for a miracle. Kristy Dykes still has work for the kingdom and a life of purpose left and I ask for mercy and more time God!

With that I'm not going to worry anymore about the question "Can He, Will He?" I'm going forward with eternal hope. I'm convinced without hope there isn't life. I heard Him speak that into my heart, without hope there isn't life.

Monday, December 10, 2007

VOMIT

What a yucky title but it's what God has put into my heart today so I'll share about vomit! lol

Proverbs 26:11 As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.

So, I stumbled across this little gem the other day and gasp surely this proverb couldn't have anything to do with me! lol I'd like to think I'm no fool so could quickly pass over this tiny passage. But surprise! Vomit can have something to do with even the squeaky clean. It's when you turn your life over to God that it becomes surprising, the places in our hearts He wants to enter. I'll be honest, there are some places I don't want to be bothered with.

On the other hand I've been praying for God to give me wisdom. It's what my soul craves. I want more from God. I'm expecting more. I want more love. I want more peace. I want to feel Him in the sweetness of peaceful sleep. I want to wake with the sweet fragrance of Him. I want Him to embrace me. I want to experience Him with every single sense that I have. It's a cry from my very soul. The reason I crave this is because I know He is calling me forth. It's what He created me for.

But what to do with some of the wisdom that, I'll be brave and be honest here, I don't think is very wise? In fact some of it seems a little silly to me. Sometimes He'll give me a nugget and I'll think, "really God? That doesn't seem very important or significant." He'll nudge me in that God-like way of His and I'll know I'm not supposed to do something or I'm supposed to do something that I don't want to do. Sometimes I want to hide and say "not right now God, I really don't want your wisdom on this issue. I've got this covered, I'll call you when I need something big, OK God?"

I love how I can be honest with God, so I asked Him what He thought and here's what He told me. As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.

I've prayed for wisdom and He IS giving it to me in a personal, unique, one of a kind way. His word says all we have to do is ask for it and it will gladly be given. Here's what I'm learning about God's wisdom, it doesn't make a lot of sense sometimes when you compare it to worldly wisdom. If I take God's wisdom and compare it to the world and then decide it's not for me than I am like a dog lapping up it's vomit.

My heartfelt prayer; Dear God what a wonderful God you are!! You continue to amaze me with even topics on vomit! God, I've always known I have a STRONG stubborn streak in me. How many times have I prayed you would take that part out of me! I thank you for using Proverbs 26:11 to teach me why you made that stubborn streak in me. God, I don't want you to take that part of me away, thank you for not answering that prayer, instead I thank you for your creation. God, I'm giving you my stubborn streak knowing you will take it and use it to help me become all that you have desired and planned for me to be! It's with your help, us working together that I will obey you. Because I love you, I WANT to obey you!

Friday, December 07, 2007

Today I got to put some Christmas decorations up around the house for my mother. She sat in a chair in the garage as I climbed up into the attic and pulled down Christmas boxes. Those who know my mother well wouldn't be surprised by this but she actually wanted to climb up the attic to sort through the boxes! That sent me into a panic, I mean my goodness the woman just had brain surgery! Does anything slow her down? Thankfully my dad arrived just in time to help pull out ALL the boxes. Dad pulled out all the stuff including outside lights and mom and I both said "oh, we don't need that. If we could just get a tree up inside." But much to my delight my dad said he's putting stuff outside too. As my mother often says to me, I told them both "that just tickles me!" Something about seeing my dad climb up that attic and pull Christmas boxes down with such love and taking the time to put out lights really touched me and meant a lot.

We are going to have Christmas!

That might seem so simple but having that hope fills my eyes with tears and gives me something to look forward too. I love Christmas because I love Jesus and I love thinking of my savior as a sweet babe. He's already so pure and sweet but something about remembering His birth delights me.

This year we're going to have an angel tree with white lights. The white lights are to celebrate the glory of the Lord and the angels are to remind us that God has sent His guarden angels to watch over and protect us.

Thursday, December 06, 2007

I've been wanting to blog so bad since my last post but I've been in Tampa staying with my sister while my mom recovered from surgery and no Internet access. Now I'm back in Jacksonville and with my mother during the day, so hopefully I can write more. I'll be staying in Florida until January. My husband came for Thanksgiving for a week and left. He'll be back at Christmas. I want to be with my mother every second I can and I'd like to share how God is taking care of me.

From the very beginning upon hearing this terrible news the Lord has promised me He will be with me and help me. He hasn't left my side and has been my confidant and best friend the whole way. I've cried on His shoulder while He warmly embraces me, I've cried out to Him for advice when there was no one else around to ask. He hasn't disappointed me in the least. When this all began I told Him kind of like this "Ok, God now this is a big blow, mind blowing actually. I'm not quite sure what all you're up too, but you have promised in your Word that you won't give me more than I can handle. So, I've got some BIG expectations of You! If I have to face losing my mother who is also my best friend then I KNOW beyond a doubt you are about to step up in a big, amazing and wonderful way." I'm counting and waiting on Him and it's not going to be any other way. I kinda told Him "God, let's see what you've got!" You know, I actually felt Him kind of chuckle at that! By the way, I find God has a sense of humor!

So let me tell you what He's done so far. First of all He made a way for me to stay in Florida an extended time. My husband has been so wonderful, loving and supportive. He understands that I need to be with my mother during this and supports me being here. Another thing the Lord lined up, after the surgery I left with the kids to Tampa so my mother could get quiet rest. It's amazing how loud 2 and 3 year olds can be! lol anyway... The Lord lined up a house for me to stay at 10 minutes way from my parents. A dear couple in my parent's church Ann and Bill arranged it all. When Ann took me inside the house to show me around, I lost my breath and my eyes filled with tears at the wonder of my God. You wouldn't believe how perfect this place is for me and my two little children. It was as if this house had been made for us! With children's videos to books and toys. In the cabinets were some of my kids favorite foods that Ann said we could use! God said right down into my heart in that house "Now didn't I say I'd take care of you!" The next big thing the Lord did, He provided TOP of the line childcare for my children so I can help take care of my mom during the day. My dad's best friend Don is the headmaster at Providence and arranged for my children to be in the preschool program. This school is AMAZING! Again I'd blown away by my God. My God knows me intimately, He knows how I feel about my children and He provided THE BEST so I feel totally confident in leaving them. As if that isn't enough Lorenzo my two year old has been having a hard time adjusting to everything going on so I took him to a walk-in clinic and discovered he has an ear infection. So today a wonderful friend in my parent's church who runs a home daycare is taking care of Lorenzo for me so again I can be here with my mother! Annette and her husband Gary have the biggest hearts and know just how to care for him giving that extra special touch!

Well isn't my God good??? I'm sorry if this got so long I just couldn't help but shout out how wonderful my Lord is!