Today was the second Tuesday in a row I've lead the women's Bible Study group at my church. I'm helping to lead it with two other women. We are studying the gifts of the Holy Spirit. It's been very interesting, most of the women in this Bible study are very shy and quiet.
I'm not sure what they think of me when I go "off" on a part of the scripture, sometimes I hear the word read and the joy of the Lord comes all over me and I can't hold back my feelings. I start speaking and a tingle comes over me, I lose track of where I am and I go to another place.
The group has asked me to lead and close on all the prayers, they say I pray beautifully. Well, I don't know about that. I feel like I'm talking to my Father so I just open up and pour it out.
On another thought; last night I was praying and I felt I had a real breakthough. I have to admit that sometimes when I pray for my husband, I secretly wonder if he'll ever come to the Lord. I have a lot of doubts. I don't like that I doubt, but sometimes the work that needs done on his heart seems too great.
On Sunday the pastor said "Ask for anything from the Lord, but what do you really want?" The sermon was based on II Chronicles 1:7-13 7 That night God appeared to Solomon and said to him, "Ask for whatever you want me to give you." 8 Solomon answered God, "You have shown great kindness to David my father and have made me king in his place. 9 Now, LORD God, let your promise to my father David be confirmed, for you have made me king over a people who are as numerous as the dust of the earth. 10 Give me wisdom and knowledge, that I may lead this people, for who is able to govern this great people of yours?" 11 God said to Solomon, "Since this is your heart's desire and you have not asked for wealth, riches or honor, nor for the death of your enemies, and since you have not asked for a long life but for wisdom and knowledge to govern my people over whom I have made you king, 12 therefore wisdom and knowledge will be given you. And I will also give you wealth, riches and honor, such as no king who was before you ever had and none after you will have."
So this got me to thinking what I want to ask God for. What do I really want? As I was praying last night, I began to speak to my Father and since God is my Father I realized that if I asked for something with a pure heart that of course my Father wouldn't deny me!!! So with a sincere and pure heart I told my Father, that all I ask from Him is that he have mercy on my home and husband that He reveal Himself in a powerful and mighty way to my husband. No matter what else comes up in my life, if this is the one thing He gives me, it would be all I ask for. I don't ask for health, I don't ask for happiness. If all my life is hardship and pain that will be ok. I just ask He have mercy on my husband.
I know my Father heard me!!!! HE HEARD ME!! I don't doubt that, now I am waiting on Him! I know He will answer my prayer, I trust in Him and I will trust in His timing!!